Two sides of life in Bali

Living in Bali is a dream for some people. Those who come over on hoilday, often gush about the Bali and the Balinese, is this place the closest thing to paradise? I hear many stories from expats aboutl ife in Bali, some good, some not. Everyone has their own opinion and I think its worth hearing them. A Bali expat sent me a email about how her Bali dream turned sour. I’m not saying I agree with all her comments, but this is what she wrote.

i have been living in bali since 2000, i got married
with a balines man two years ago, i have a baby one
year old and i was totally in love with bali and
balinese people until now, since two weeks ago my
opinion about balinese people has change totally
i need to say to somebody what i think or how i feel
now
now way they are 99% good people, balinese are
jeoulosy, sorry don´t know the word in english, they
have a lot envy, they live only by and for the
religion and the banjar, they follow the banjar and
the ceremony templos just by rutine many times, they
have not idea about what is commitment, compromise,
responsability, iniciative, they are dificult people
when there is a problem around, they hidden themself
and they run away, they don´t know how to face a
problem, they have not compassion, they have nice and
beautiful smiles outside but many times are not real
at all, they can be very arrogant, very machist, the
balines woman suffered a lot, there is a lot fare
about black magic, many people believe in this and
they are so scare about that, they run away from their
jobs many times without say anything, they are not
that good with children as we all foreigners think all
the time, it is only that they are all the time with
children because the most of them are not working,
that doesn´t mean they are better than westernes with
children, man are lazy and they could be all day lying
down, sitting on the banjar and sleeping, a lot
balines has not experience about anything or have not
knowlege at all about anything, they are very
ignorant, focus totally in their life at the banjar
and at the temples, they have not values in life, has
not education, but of course they smile and
smile…….laugh all the time, this makes them so
nice and good……they are dangerous, better don´t
make a balines ungry with you becuase he could kill
you or do anything, black magic……this is another
planet really, people thinking and living in diferent
ways, nothing to do with the rest of us, we always be
tamu and outsides always always, we are so diferent,
there is a lot human mysery behind their smiles,
everybody knows my problems now and knowbody seems to
know anything, nobody really cares or nobody wants to
help, they are deaf, damn…..nobody want to mix with
the problems of the other people, they don´t have
mind, thoughts, opinions, they follow their banjars,
they don´t questions anything, they are egoists,
really egoists, they are really coward, very coward,
they are not interested about the world around them,
they are happy with the ceremonies and their banjar or
it seems like everybody thinks that, are they really
happy????? they ask you all the time stupid questions,
sudah mandi, balum mandi, sudah makan, going up to the
road to my house a neigboard is asking me mau ke
mana?????? aduhhhhhh pulang of course, sometimes I get
sick answering these kind the questions, really
stupids even when I have been doind these as well for
fice years, but now aduhhhhhhhhhh all my beautiful
life in Bali is a fake, everything has been a lie,
everybody has not been that helpful nice and good
people, they are weak, run away, they are like
children……..
aduhhhhhhhh sorry to tell you all this this is a
nighmare and i am only only me, i am terrible lonely
in a society i don´t understand anymore and nobody
seems to be nice, my husband has been a evil for two
weeks and i don´t understand what is happening, here
nobody is doing anything, not his family, not the
people around, i could say friends but not i realise
that i have not friends, even when i know a lot a
lottttt people, his beautiful smile terjadi now a
monster and now i have not idea what to do, just pray
and pray to keep my mind sane, because i have a baby,
i am trying not to get crazy and be strong in front of
my little putu……
just now i only can say that bali is not the paradise
and balinese people are not as good as everybody
thing, there is a lot back sides about balinese
people, about their culture and their tradictions but
it seems like nobody talk about that, i don´t think i
am the only person who think this, a culture without
values……..
balines can be very agressive as well, they have not
idea about what is honor, responsability, loyalty,
malu, work, friendship, it seems like everything in
bali has harmony and it is very good but not, not
sorry, look some families……some people…..
please pray for me maybe I am already starting to be
crazy as well